Listen

I am a hypocrite. Every week, I sit down and try to write something inspiring about a circumstance in my life or a lesson to be learned from a mistake, but sometimes I can’t even find the silver linings that I propose.

I’ve had a tough week; there was devastation in my family, goodbyes with nothing good about them, and an all new life to find for myself. I’ve been trying so hard to look at going away as a positive thing but somewhere inside of this inspo-blogger is a little pessimist that pokes through with change. It doesn’t matter how many times I listen to my “Sunshine” playlist or read over my favorite journal entries, I have this lingering social anxiety that just won’t dissipate.

But here I am, a week into college with new friends, genuinely being myself, and I could not be more proud of where I am. I learned to believe that what I say is true. I decided to listen to my own advice. They say good things happen to bold people and that is precisely the energy that I have decided to manifest given recent changes.

I’m scared to death if I’m being honest, but that doesn’t mean I am rendered incapable. Here is my truth: I know change is scary, but if you know that what is coming will be better than what is passed, do it anyways. Do it afraid. Do it despite the anxiety. Look your fears in the eyes and tell them that they have no power. I came to college with a broken heart and an absent mind, but I refused to let my fear stop me from making connections that would serve me throughout the next four years. Do it afraid and don’t look back…if you can’t muster up enough courage to make it that far, then fake it! Fake your own confidence until you become so comfortable that your fearless persona is no longer a falsehood, but rather a fact.

To all of my readers who can’t listen to their own advice, listen to mine! Do it afraid, do it fake, do whatever you must do in order to become the highest, most authentic version of yourself. One day we will all wake up and realize that the fake has faded and the fear has lost its foothold and we will be so uncontrollably content with who we’ve become and we will laugh as we look back at the lies we once told ourselves.

With love, Ev.